Q: What is the difference between oral and anal sex? A: Oral sex makes your day and Anal sex makes your whole weak.
Q: Ever had sex while camping? A: It's fucking intents.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a taxi cab? A: You have to pay to ride in a taxi cab.
Yo mama's so fat when she is having sex, her partner doesen't know if it's in her butt or her boobs.
Yo mama so fat when you have sex with her you have to slap her stomach and ride the wave in.
Q: Why do blondes need to have orgasms? A: So they know when to stop having sex.
Three women were sitting around throwing back a few drinks and talking about their sex lives. Karen said, "I call my husband the dentist because nobody can drill like he does." Joanne giggled and confessed, "I call my husband the miner, because of his incredible shaft." Kathy quietly sipped her whiskey until Joanne finally asked, "Well, what do you call your boyfriend?" Kathy frowned and said, "The postman." Looking puzzeled Joanne asked, "Why the postman?" "Because… he always delivers late and half the time it’s in the wrong box."
A woman went to the doctor's and complained of being really sore. "Do you have any idea why?" "Well, I had sex with an elephant!" "You did? But elephants are known to have small penises!" "Yeah, but he fingered me first."
Question: How can you tell if your wife is dead? Answer: The sex will be the same but the dishes will pile up.
Why do men like having sex with the lights on? It makes it easier to put a name to the face.