The best sex jokes

Q. How do you know when you are getting old? A. When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.
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has 66.03 % from 267 votes. More jokes about: age, fart, sex
Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it...
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has 65.94 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, dirty, sex
Forget that! Playing doctor is for kids! Let's play gynecologist.
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has 65.91 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dirty, doctor, flirt, game, sex
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw an unusually beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight toward his seat. Lo and behold, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation, he blurted out, "Business trip or vacation?" She turned, smiled and said, "Business. I'm going to the Annual Sexual Studies Convention in Chicago". He swallowed hard. Here was the gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him and she was going to a meeting about sexual studies! Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?" "Lecturer," she responded. "I use my extensive personal experience to share interesting facts about sexuality. "Really," he gulped,"like what?" "Well," she explained, "For instance, Native American Indians are the most passionate. While Jewish men are the most likely to satisfy a woman fully. And in terms of lasting the longest, surprisingly it's the Southern redneck." Suddenly, the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm sorry," she said, "I shouldn't really be discussing this with you. I don't even know your name." "Um, Tonto Goldstein. But my friends call me Bubba."
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has 65.91 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: airplane, communication, redneck, sex, women
3 Stages of Sex: 1. House Sex - When you are newly married and have sex all over the house, in every room. 2. Bedroom Sex - After you've been married for a while and you just have sex in the bedroom. 3. Hall Sex - After you've been married for many years, and you just pass each other in the hall and say, "F**k you!"
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has 65.86 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: life, marriage, sex
At school one day, the teacher was trying to approach the topic of sex education and asked her students if they'd ever seen anything that was related to sex education on TV. Mary raised her hand and said she had seen a movie about women having babies. "Great," said the teacher, "that's very important." Then Judy raised her hand and told the teacher she had seen a TV show about people getting married. "Well, that has to do with it too," said the teacher. Then Johnny raised his hand and said he had seen a western where some Indians came riding over the hill and John Wayne shot them all. The teacher said, "Well, Johnny, that really doesn't have anything to do with sex education." "Yes it does," said Johnny, " it taught those Indians not to f**k with John Wayne."
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has 65.79 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: baby, little Johnny, school, sex, teacher
My girlfriend has 206 bones in her body. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207...
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has 65.78 % from 224 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex
Q: How do you know when a machanic has had sex? A: Two of his fingers are clean.
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has 65.77 % from 268 votes. More jokes about: dirty, mechanic, sex
Knock-Knock Who is there? A long penis with a naked head. Come in please we were waiting for you.
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has 65.62 % from 273 votes. More jokes about: dirty, knock-knock, sex
Q: Why do women have two holes so close together? A: In case you miss.
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has 65.60 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: sex, women
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