The best sex jokes

How do you know if your wife wears tights in bed? Her toes curl up when you screw her.
Vote: has 38.74 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Did you hear about the new contraceptive pill for men? You put it in your shoe and it makes you limp.
Vote: has 38.74 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Two condoms are walking down the street when they walk by a gay bar. One condom says to the other, "Hey man, you wanna get shit-faced?"
Vote: has 38.74 % from 82 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bar, gay, sex
How do you know when your cat’s finished cleaning himself? He’s smoking a cigarette.
Vote: has 38.49 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
What do you say to a virgin? Thanks for nothing!
Vote: has 38.48 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, sex
What's the difference between a dead baby and a table? You can't fuck a table.
Vote: has 38.25 % from 46 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, dirty, disgusting, sex
Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your mom.
Vote: has 37.72 % from 108 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, sex, ugly
I tried some of that aphrodisiac rhino horn and it really worked. I’m really beginning to fancy those rhinos now.
Vote: has 37.68 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
‘He had ambitions at one time to become a sex maniac, but he failed his practical.’ Les Dawson
Vote: has 37.60 % from 56 votes. Send joke:

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In bed my girlfriend used to mentally dress me.
Vote: has 37.45 % from 40 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex