Man cannot live on bread alone – he needs a bit of crumpet too.
Two old ladies are discussing their dead husbands. ‘Tell me,’ says one. ‘Did you have mutual orgasms?’ ‘No,’ says the other. ‘I think we were with the Prudential.’
My girlfriend used to give amazing blow jobs, but lately they haven't been so great - they are starting to hurt me now since her baby teeth started growing in.
I haven’t been the same since my testicles dropped. Mind you, I was hanging from a tree by them at the time.
I’m a very giving lover – I give Green Shield Stamps.
John Leslie has been accused of raping a disabled black girl on Blue Peter. He blamed it on dyslexia & said he thought the script said, use sticky black spastic.
Q:What did the black girl say while having sex? A:Dad get off me your crushing my ciggs.
Kock, Knock Who is there? Suck, suck. Suck, suck who? After a long pause with a low voice: My dick; dear!
Q: What's the difference between jelly and jam? A: I can't jelly my dick a baby's throat.
What is special about a dead baby over all other forms of life? You can achieve deep throat from whichever way you enter.