Being single is cool cause you can eat a whole jar of pepperoncinis and spend the rest of the night farting spicily into the abyss.
"Siri, why am I still single?" Siri activates front camera.
Two old people flirt at a seniors' singles bar. After a few drinks, the old man asks the old woman, "If I took you out for a full night of wining, dining and dancing, what would you wear?" The old woman replies shyly, "Depends..." "Depends on what?" he asks. "On my bottom - where else?!"
Q: What's the worst thing about being lonely? A: Playing Frisbee.
Q. What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common? A. They're married.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm pregnant and then I realize I would have to be like 19 months pregnant.
5 stages of being single: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, texting your ex something random then going like "sorry wrong message".
Happy Father's Day to the top three most likely candidates.
1 ...... 2