Why are football stadiums always cool? "Because they're full of fans."
The seven dwarves are down in the mines when there is a cave-in. Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them. In the distance a voice shouts out "Charlton are good enough to win the European Cup." Snow White says "Well at least Dopey's alive!"
What's a bee's favourite sport? Rugbee.
Q: What do the World Series and bears on birth control have in common? A: No Cubs
The frustrated golfer drove over the river and threw the woods. Swimming
What did the trampolinist say? ‘Life has its ups and downs, but I always bounce back.’ Tennis
It's game 7 of the NBA finals and a man makes his way to his seat at center court. He sits down and notices that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone is sitting there. He responds, "No, the seat's empty." "The first man exclaims, "What?!? Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the NBA finals and not use it?" The neighbor responds, "Well the seat is mine, but my wife passed away and this is the first NBA finals we haven't been together." The first man responds," I'm sorry to hear that. Wasn't there anyone else, a friend or relative, that could've taken that seat?" The neighbor responds, "No, they're all at the funeral."
Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player? Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan.
Why did the football coach flood the pitch? Because he wanted to bring on the sub!