The best sport jokes

Why are football stadiums always cool? "Because they're full of fans."
Vote:
has 31.97 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: football, sport
It's game 7 of the NBA finals and a man makes his way to his seat at center court. He sits down and notices that the seat next to him is empty. He leans over and asks his neighbor if someone is sitting there. He responds, "No, the seat's empty." "The first man exclaims, "What?!? Who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the NBA finals and not use it?" The neighbor responds, "Well the seat is mine, but my wife passed away and this is the first NBA finals we haven't been together." The first man responds," I'm sorry to hear that. Wasn't there anyone else, a friend or relative, that could've taken that seat?" The neighbor responds, "No, they're all at the funeral."
Vote:
has 31.89 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: funeral, sport, wife
A psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving give an oral quiz to the freshman class. Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?" A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"
Vote:
has 31.56 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: sport
What’s the difference between an aerobics instructor and a torturer? The torturer would apologize first.
Vote:
has 31.56 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: sport
A lawyer and a basketball player want to make a deal. Suggest a place where both of them would be happy to meet. Of course, they should at the court.
Vote:
has 31.25 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: communication, lawyer, sport
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays."
Vote:
has 31.25 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: fitness, gym, phone, sport, time
Why doesn’t Mexico have an Olympic team? All the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already in the USA.
Vote:
has 31.08 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: sport
There was an old man named Bill, and one of the things he most enjoyed was playing golf with his old buddy Fred. Bill's wife always commented on how happy he looked after a game. But one day he came home from their weekly game looking terrible and very tired. His wife asked, "What's the matter, Bill? You always seem so happy after golf and you look miserable right now." Bill said, "Well, something terrible happened. Fred had a heart attack on the first hole." "My God, honey!" said the wife, rushing to comfort him. "That must've been terrible!" "It was," he said. "All day long it was: hit the ball, drag Fred to the ball, and then hit it again..."
Vote:
has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: game, god, golf, sport, wife
The Golfer asked his Caddy, "Hey boy, do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday? Caddy replied, "The way you play, Sir, its a crime any day of the week!"
Vote:
has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: golf, sport
A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked up to have a talk with him. "I've figured out your problem," he told the young southpaw. "You always lose control at the same point in every game." "When is that?" "Right after the National Anthem."
Vote:
has 30.41 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: game, sport
<<<35363738
More jokes →
Page 35 of 44.