Yo mama so dumb that when she looked in a mirror she yelled stop copying me.
Vote:
Two adventurers John and Jack were hunting for gold in the desert.
After roaming all day long under the hot sun, they set up their tent and fell asleep.
Some hours later, John woke up his friend.
"Jack, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Jack looked up and replied, "I can see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?" asked John.
Jack thought for a minute and said.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
After a moment of silence, John spoke.
"It tells two things to me. First is that... you are an idiot."
Jack looked at John, surprised. "Why do you say so?" he said.
"Because it has still not occurred to you that someone has stolen our tent." replied John.
Q: What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant with triplets?
A: She went looking for the three guys.
Yo mama's so dumb, she thinks socialism means partying!
Vote:
When Chuck Norris says 'Candyman' five times in a row, no one appears.
Candyman ain't stupid.
Vote:
At the gym:
Me: "What does this machine do?"
"Sir, that's a bench."
Me: "Perfect."
Yo momma is so stupid she stared at an orange juice container for 2 hours because it said concentrate.
A blonde is watching a ventriloquist perform at a bar and the ventriloquist, with his dummy, is telling blonde joke after blonde joke, filling the bar with laughter.
After several of these jokes, the blonde stands up, infuriated, and yells, "Listen here, jack*ss. Not all blondes are stupid and the jokes need to stop, it is a very cheap way to get laughs."
Stunned, the ventriloquist timidly begins to apologize, "Ma'am, I am so sorry. I had no idea I was offending anyone."
The blonde replies, "Stay out of this, sir. I'm talking to that little sh*t on your knee!"
A woman called the Colorado State Division of Wildlife regarding a snake in her backyard.
"Can you tell me what kind it is?" she asked.
"Can you describe it?" I asked.
"Yes," she said. "It's long and thin."
Vote:
Joke has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, geography, stupid, weather
Q: How do you plant dope?
A: Bury a blonde.