The best technology jokes

Yo' Mama is so stupid, she smashed open her TV hoping to find a TV dinner.
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has 48.02 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: stupid, technology, Yo mama
SWISS ARMY KNIFE -- male, because even though it appears useful for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles. KIDNEYS -- female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs. TIRE -- male, because it goes bald and is often over-inflated. HOT AIR BALLOON: male, because to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it . . . and, of course, there's the hot air part. SPONGES -- female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain water. WEB PAGE -- female, because it is always getting hit on. SHOE -- male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out. COPIER -- female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up -- because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are pushed -- because it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed. ZIPLOC BAGS -- male, because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them. SUBWAY -- male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up. HAMMER -- male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around. REMOTE CONTROL -- Definitely female, because it gives men pleasure; he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying.
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has 48.02 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: marriage, technology, time, travel
Did you hear about the music app that is preloaded on every iPhone 6 plus? GarageBend.
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: IT, music, phone, technology
Yo mama so stupid when I said I was going to the big apple she said bring me back one.
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: business, insulting, stupid, technology, Yo mama
Doctor, doctor, should I surf the Internet on an empty stomach? No, you should do it on a computer.
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has 47.24 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: computer, doctor, internet, medical, technology
What do the latest Iphone 6 applications do? Whiten teeth and perform laser eye surgery!
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has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone, technology
At recent trade talks the American representative offered to sell sophisticated American telephone technology to the Russians. American : "In the United States, anyone can pick up any phone and dial 9-1-1. This will record the call and connect them with the police." Russian : "In Russia we don't require that you dial anything."
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has 46.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: cop, phone, technology
Here is an explanation of the school homework policy for the average student. Students should not spend more than ninety minutes per night. This time should be budgeted in the following manner if the student desires to achieve moderate to good grades in his/her classes. 15 minutes looking for assignment. 11 minutes calling a friend for the assignment. 23 minutes explaining why the teacher is mean and just does not like children. 8 minutes in the bathroom. 10 minutes getting a snack. 7 minutes checking the TV Guide. 6 minutes telling parents that the teacher never explained the assignment. 10 minutes sitting at the kitchen table waiting for Mom or Dad to do the assignment.
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has 45.78 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: school, student, teacher, technology, time
Yo mamma so stupid she puts a piece of paper on the TV and says, "I'm watching paper-view."
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: stupid, technology, Yo mama
Only Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook.
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has 45.29 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Facebook, IT, technology
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