Q: What's the difference between an iceberg and a clothes brush?
A: One crushes boats and the other brushes coats!
Q: What's a good holiday tip?
A: Never catch snowflakes with your tongue until all the birds have gone south for the winter.
Vote:
Q: What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
A: Polar Bond.
Q: How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed?
A: You wake up wet!
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Jimmy is calling Sergey, who he met at an international conference.
Jimmy: "Hi, I've hear there is minus 54 degrees Celsius."
Sergey: "Nonsense, not even minus 15!"
Jimmy: "But on CNN, they've just shown a thermometer..."
Sergey: "Ohh, ok, maybe outside."
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Q: Where does a snowman keep his money?
A: In a snow bank.
Q: Why do birds fly south in the winter?
A: Because it's too far to walk!
Q: Why do more niggers get hit by cars in the winter?
A: They're easier to spot.
My mother has painted a picture with such cold colours that if I want to take a look at it closely, I must have an anorak, the gloves, the winter cap and a scarf on, not to freeze.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater?
A: They went to see "Closed for the Winter".