Chuck Norris inflated a flat school bus tire, with his lungs.
When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.
Q: What do cannibal tax advisors do after their office Christmas Dinner? A: Toast their clients.
How are babies and the elderly alike? Both are fun to throw out of moving cars.
Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room.
Chuck Norris can arrive anywhere without actually leaving.
Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: Women's Rights.
If Chuck Norris is defusing a bomb and has a choice of red wire, yellow wire and green wire, he chooses blue.
A Football team was on the field during practice, when to their surprise, a big turkey suddenly walked up to the coach and demanded a tryout. "Are you crazy," hollered the coach, "we don’t give tryouts to turkeys." Before he knew it the turkey started dashing towards the football and made a fantastic catch. "That was amazing," exclaimed the coach. "I have never seen anything like that! How much do you want for a year?" "Don’t worry about money," said the turkey, "let me just ask you something, does the season go past thanksgiving?"
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a bear while on a survival trek in Siberia. That incident was known as the Tunguska event.