Best jokes ever

Girl, do you need to get your protein macros up? Because I'd gladly put my meat inside you.
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty, fitness, flirt, food, sex
Doctor, doctor, should I surf the Internet on an empty stomach? No, you should do it on a computer.
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: computer, doctor, internet, medical, technology
Chuck Norris is what makes the Central Nervous System nervous
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
During a conversation regarding new potential Johny's job: "Johny, tell us and what is your weak feature?" Johny: "Openness!" Interviewer: "But the openness isn't a weak feature!" Johny: "Ok, but I fuck what you think!"
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: communication, little Johnny, vulgar, work
Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, Chuck Norris
Imagine, there are on the bus only 5 persons: A busman, an old woman, two younger women and one man. The old woman comes to the busman and tells him: "Dear busman, would you like to eat a few hazelnuts?" The busman says: "Yes, why not?" He takes the hazelnuts from her hand and eats them. This repeats even two times, but when the old woman offers other hazelnuts to the busman for the fourth time, the busman asks this old woman: "Madame, where do you take all these hazelnuts from? It is a real amount and I am already full." The old woman only says: "You know, dear busman, I have bought the chocolate with hazelnuts, the hazelnuts are very hard for my dental plate, so I have sucked them all out, brought it to you and you have already eaten them all."
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: age, chocolate, dentist, disgusting, food
Chuck Norris gets younger by the kill.
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris, death
I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man. Love, To forgive him and; Patience, For his moods. Because if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death.
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has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: death, love, women
Coach: Your roommate and the captain of the team reported that you have many bad words for me in your sleep! So do you abuse me in your sleep! Football Player: Coach, It is just not true! Coach: What is not true, I trust the captain and I am asking this in front of him! Football player: Coach, It is untrue that I was sleeping!
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has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: football, sport
Chuck Norris never actually moves. He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
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has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
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