Best jokes ever

Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs, with a ten inch penis? A: "Partially disabled."

Barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife's yelling at the front wanting in. Which one do you let in? The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!

Q: Why do blacks walk the way they do? A: Because they spent the first 9 months of their lives dodging a coat hanger.

Chuck Norris was hungry so he went to eat a hotdog. When he saw it giggled and said: "What a bad luck! Look what a part of a dog I've to eat!"

A schoolteacher was arrested today at Gatwick Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, the Home Secretary said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the police with carrying weapons of maths instruction.

What do you call hemorrhoids on a fag? Speed bumps.

Q: Why are fish so smart? A: Because they live in schools.

Black magic... It doesn't work.

Yo Mama's so stupid I asked her to buy me a pare of sneakers and she came back with 2 candy bars.

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.