Chuck Norris can clog the toilet with his pee.
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Q: Why do blacks have flat noses?
A: That's where God put his foot when he pulled off their tails.
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Chuck Norris can make you laugh at your own funeral.
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Chuck Norris gets younger by the kill.
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Pull on a coworker is to press ctrl+print screen on their workstation, then paste it into Paint, save the pic, and set it as the desktop background.
Move all of their icons to the trash.
When they get back to their desk, clicking won't accomplish anything!
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Every 5 seconds, somewhere in the world, someone dies of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is what makes the Central Nervous System nervous
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Q: How many mathematicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: On average or do you want the whole distribution?
Q: If a man crashes his car into a woman who's fault is it?
A: Well what was the man doing driving in the kitchen...
Little Johnny's brother, Little Jimmy, was in the toilet throwing Johnny's toys in the toilet.
Johnny saw his brother doing this and yelled "JIMMY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
His brother replied "Next time you'll think twice before you don't let me play with you."
Little Jimmy threw a toy car in the toilet and said "Bye bye, racecars!"
Little Johnny stuck little Jimmy head in the toilet saying "Bye bye brother!"