A carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady.
He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he'd lost his cigarettes.
In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump.
''No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes,'' he said to himself.
He proceeded to get out his hammer and flattened the hump.
As he was cleaning up, the lady came in.
''Here,'' she said, handling him his pack of cigarettes. ''I found them in the hallway.''
''Now,'' she said, ''if only I could find my parakeet.''
Chuck Norris doesn't die...he just sleep in the ground for a little bit.
Vote:
Do you know why God is called "God"?
Because "Chuck Norris" is already taken.
Vote:
I wanna go inside your wine cabinet and pull myself out a stiff one.
July 4th is Independence day.
And the day Chuck Norris was born.
Coincidence? I think not.
Vote:
Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off.
It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.
Vote:
Yo mama ass so big your dad's dick gets lost in it.
Chuck Norris' free advice is worth a fortune.
Vote:
Chuck Norris can "make it rain in Southern California".
Vote:
Chuck Norris stuffs lockers into bullies!