The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
A blonde girl was talking to her redhead friend about her boyfriend's dandruff problem. The redhead says "Why don't you give him Head and Shoulders?" The blonde replies, "How do you give shoulders?"
Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
YO MAMA IS SO STUPID SHE GOT FIRED FROM A BL*W JOB.
What’s the difference between a car salesman and a computer salesman? The car salesman can probably drive!
For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob. On the wall? Art. On the floor? Matt.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names.
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a toothbrush? A: You don't share a toothbrush with your friends.
What do mopeds and fat ladies have in common? They're both a great ride until someone sees you on one.