Best jokes ever

What has a head, a tail, and no body? A coin!
Vote: has 39.50 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
Hitler is daddy! Hump me! Fuck me! Daddy better gas them Jews. My gas chambers love the smoke. G-g-gas the Jews.
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More jokes about: black humor, Hitler, jewish, morbid
A penguin's car breaks down and he has it towed to a repair shop. The mechanic tells him that he should have some information in about an hour. The penguin sees an ice cream shop across the street so he wanders over while the mechanic works. He finds the vanilla is the best ice cream he's ever eaten and he eats it with messy and gluttonous abandon getting it all over his face. He goes back to the mechanic's to check on his car. The mechanic informs him, "It looks as though you've blown a seal." "Oh, no." replies the penguin "It's just some ice cream."
Vote: has 39.50 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, car, mechanic, work
Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: What do lawyers wear to court? A: Lawsuits!
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More jokes about: lawyer
What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume!
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More jokes about: baby, black humor, dead baby
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice.
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More jokes about: dirty, women
Yo' Mama is like a hockey player, she doesn't change her pad for three periods.
Vote: has 39.47 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: game, sport, Yo mama
Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail when she was hammering? The noise gave her a headache.
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More jokes about: blonde
Q: What's all over a clean nose? A: Fingerprints.
Vote: has 39.47 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol