Best jokes ever

An organization is like a tree full of monkeys, all on different limbs at different levels. The monkeys on top look down and see a tree full of smiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing but assholes.
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: management, office, work
Did you hear about the overweight man who took up horse riding as exercise? The horse lost 15 pounds in a week!
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris can find the end of a circle.
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
One day a young teen was in a church for the first time and he got a seat net to a not-so-good-looking woman. The pastor was preaching and he said: "Tell your neighbour how beautiful they are" and the boy stood up and said pastor "How can you expect me to lie in a church?"
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beauty, church, teen, women
Q: Whats the difference between Niagara and Viagra? A: Niagara Falls.
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, viagra
Roger, who was 19 years old, was buying an expensive bracelet, to surprise his girlfriend on Valentine's Day, at a very smart jeweller's shop in Hatton Garden, London. The jeweller inquired, "Would you like your girlfriend's name engraved on it?" Roger thought for a moment, grinned, then answered, "No, instead engrave 'To my one and only love'." The jeweller smiled and said, "Yes, sir; how very romantic of you." Roger retorted with a glint in his eye, "Not exactly romantic, but very practical. This way, if we break up, I can use it again."
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: love, mean, relationship, romantic, Valentines day
You don't invite Chuck Norris. He invites himself.
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris
A chubbier woman: "Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?" Mirror: "Kindly move aside. I can't see anything."
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: insulting, ugly, women
CAPS LOCK – Preventing Login Since 1980.
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: computer, geek, IT, time
A guy stumbles through the front door of a bar, ambles up to the bartender and orders a beer. The bartender looks at the drunk man and says,”I’m sorry sir, but I can’t serve you…you’ve already had too much to drink.” The guy swears and walks out of the bar. Five minutes later the guy comes flying through the side door of the bar, and yells for a beer. Again the bartender says,”I’m sorry, sir…but I can’t serve you…you’ve already had too much to drink!” Ten minutes later, the same guy comes barrel-assing through the back door of the bar, storms up to the bartender, and demands a beer. Again, the bartender says to the man…”I’m really sorry, sir, but you’ve had too much to drink…you’re going to have to leave!” The guy looks quizzically at the bartender and says finally, “My God, man… How many bars do you work at?!”
Vote: has 80.46 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, beer, drunk