Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross.
Just never his own.
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Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
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Chuck Norris used to date Hurricane Katrina.
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Chuck Norris does not understand any phrase that begins with "if at first you don't succeed."
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America doesn't need a military...
We've got Chuck Norris
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Time waits for no man.
Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
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Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
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Chuck Norris protects his body guards.
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A lion once put his head inside the mouth of Chuck Norris.
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Simon doesn't say... Chuck Norris says.
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Chuck Norris was once charged with three attempted murders in Boulder County, but the Judge quickly dropped the charges because Chuck Norris does not "attempt" murder.
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