Q: What is height of Craziness? A: Getting a blank paper Xeroxed.
The creation of a perfect sphere became possible after Chuck Norris became enraged with a rubix cube and roundhouse kicked the corners off it.
Chuck Norris is the only person that can make you feel a punch to your face in your groin.
What do cows sing at their friends birthday parties? "Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo."
That bull you sold me is a lazy good-for-nothing. I told you he was a bum steer.
What do you call a rabbit that plays with foxes? A dumb bunny.
Chuck Norris cleans his teeth with a dentists drill.
This blonde cop stops a blonde driver and asks for identification. The blonde driver looks all around in her purse and can’t find her license. “I must have left it at home, officer.” “Well, do you have any kind of identification on you?” asks the cop. The blonde takes out a pocket mirror and says, “I do have this picture of me.” “Let me see it,” says the cop. She holds up the mirror and looks in it. Then she says, “Sorry. If I had known you were a police officer, I wouldn’t have stopped you."
Chuck Norris was banned from going to "housewarming" parties because he kept burning them down.
Two hunters are stalking through the forest when one says to the other that he has to take a dump. "Well, go in the bushes." "What should I use to wipe my ass?" "Use a dollar bill." A few minutes later the hunter steps out of the bushes with s**t all over his hands. "What happened?" asks his friend. "I didn't have a dollar bill, so I used four quarters."