Best jokes ever

What's red, bubbly, and scratches at the window before exploding? A baby in a microwave.
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has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: black humor
A proud new father sits down with his dad to have a drink. "Well son, now that you have a son of your own its time I gave you something." "Dad you don´t mea-" "Yes I do. You've earned it." Says the father as he passes a copy of '1001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition' to the son. "Dad I dont know what to say...I'm honored." "Hi honored," Replies the father. "I'm dad."
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has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, dad, old people, time
Q: What has two legs and bleeds? A: Half a cat.
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has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: cat, disgusting
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit? Are you gonna eat that?
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has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Chuck Norris can find a hay in a needle stack.
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has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris scares cows so bad, milk comes out their nose.
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has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.
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has 44.56 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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has 44.56 % from 72 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, disgusting, morbid, music
Yo mamma is stupid she bought tickets to Flo ridas concert but instead she went to Florida.
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has 44.54 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: music, stupid, travel, Yo mama
When Chuck Norris eats dinner at a restaurant, the wait staff tips him.
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has 44.53 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food, money
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