Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
The boss speaking with the secretary: Who told you that, if I kissed you a couple of time, you have the right to laze all day long? My lawyer.
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: lawyer
How many bankers does it take to change a light bulb? Four. One to hold the bulb, and three to try and remember the combination.
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: money
A 2006 study found that the average American walks about 900 miles a year. Another recent study found that Americans drink an average of 22 gallons of beer a year. That means, on average, Americans get about 41 miles per gallon. Not bad.
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
One night, a police officer was staking out a particularly rowdy bar for possible violations of the driving-under-the-influence laws. At closing time, he saw a fellow stumble out of the bar, trip on the curb, and try his keys on five different cars before he found his. Then, sat in the front seat fumbling around with his keys for several minutes. Everyone else left the bar and drove off. Finally, the fellow started his engine and began to pull away. The police officer was waiting for him. He stopped the driver, read him his rights and administered the Breathalyzer test. The results showed a reading of 0.0. The puzzled officer demanded to know how that could be. The driver replied, "Tonight, I'm the designated decoy"
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can't bring that dog in here!" The guy, without missing a beat, says "This is my seeing-eye dog." "Oh man, "the bartender says, "I'm sorry. Here, the first one's on me." The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door. Another guy walks in the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guy sees him, stops him and says "You can't bring that dog in here unless you tell the bartender it's a seeing-eye dog." The second man graciously thanks the first man and continues to the bar. He asks for a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you can't bring that dog in here!" The second man replies "This is my seeing-eye dog." The bartender says, "No, I don't think so. They don't have Chihuahuas as seeing-eye dogs." The man pauses for a half-second and replies "What?!?! They gave me a Chihuahua?!?"
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Your momma so stupid, when I told her it was chilly outside she ran out with a spoon!
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
Your momma's so fat the only time she sees "90210" is when she's on a scale.
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
Yo mama breath smell so bad when she yawns her teeth duck.
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: insulting, Yo mama
A boxer goes to a doctor complaining of insomnia. ‘Have you tried counting sheep?’ asks the doctor. ‘It doesn’t work,’ replies the boxer. ‘Every time I get to nine, I stand up.’
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: sport
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