Anxiety: Getting up to see why the baby isn’t crying.
He: So then, what's your sign?
She: Dollar.
An ant and an elephant share a night of romance.
The next morning the ant wakes up and the elephant is dead.
"Shit!" says the ant.
"One night of passion and I will spend the rest of my life digging a grave!"
Did you hear the joke about the skunk?
Never mind, it stinks.
Chuck Norris never felt fear, and he never will.
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What did one skunk say to another?
And so do you.
Why is a reindeer like a gossip?
Because they are both tail bearers.
What kind of whale flies?
Pilot whales.
How do you lead a horse to water?
With lots of carrots.
Hip-Hop is dead because of Chuck Norris.
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