Ozzy Ozbourne once bit the head off a bat. Not one to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off Batman!
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If Charlie Sheen is winning, it's only because Chuck Norris isn't playing.
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The AC/DC song "Highway to Hell" is about Chuck Norris' driveway.
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God created Adam, Adam saw Chuck Norris, Adam created tears.
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Chuck Norris once rolled a dice.
It landed on tails.
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When Light wrote Chuck Norris' name in the Death Note, the book died.
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Ted said to his friend, 'can you lend me $10?'
'But I only have $8,' his friend replied.
That's OK, you can always owe me the other $2!
The absent-minded teacher paused to chat awhile with one of her students, then asked, "Which way was I going when I stopped to talk to you?"
"That way", the student pointed.
''Good,'' said the teacher, ''then I've had my lunch."
What's got four wheels, smokes and squeals?
A bus load of babies on fire.
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How many blondes does it take to play tag?
One.