How fast can a women drive? 68 mph.
If she hits 69, she flips over and blows a rod.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to change the past.
He has never made any mistakes.
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Chuck Norris recently got himself an iPad.
It turned into iDust when he tried to use it.
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Q: Why didn't the dentist ask his secretary out?
A: He was already taking out a tooth.
Yo mama so fat you cant tell if she got a penis or a vagina.
Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
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Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed.
Some get away.
They are called astronauts.
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What you call a wrecking ball, Chuck Norris calls a punching bag.
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They were just five lakes, until Chuck Norris said they were Great!
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Yo mama so stupid, she went to a garage sale to buy a garage