What do ducks wear to party's?
A duck-sedo!
Yo mamas so nasty, she went to the hair salon, took off her shirt, and said "I wanna impress a boy, so braid it."
A blonde is on holiday and she wallks into an internet cafe to send an e-mail to her mum in America.
She doesn't know how to work the computers so she goes up to the guy on the desk and says: "Excuse me could you help me send an e-mail to my mum?"
The guy says "Yeh, but it will cost ya"
And the blonde says "Sure i'll do anything for my mum"
The guy says: "In that case follow me"
So she follows him into the back room and he pushes her down onto her knees, he unzips his trousers and pulls down his boxers and says: "Well go on then you said you'd do anything!"
So she picks up his dick, holds it to her mouth and says: "Hello.........mum are you there?"
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Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
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Yo momma’s so fat, she’s on both sides of the family.
What’s it called when a woman is paralysed from the waist down?
Marriage.
Everyone knows the speed of light...
Chuck Norris knows the speed of darkness.
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Chuck Norris can break his opponents serve with an ace.
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Chuck Norris put corns in the Milky Way and eat them at his breakfast.
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Those who ignore history, are doomed by Chuck Norris.
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