Chuck Norris is the only one who has a silver goldfish.
Vote:
Q: How do you fix a broken website?
A: With stick e-tape.
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"Yo momma so fat she fell in love and broke it!"
The Boyfriend says to his blonde girlfriend, "Look!
A dead bird!" and the blonde looks up in the sky and says "Where?"
Where does a boat go when it is sick?
The dock.
A young college co-ed came running in tears to her father. "Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!"
"I did? What did I tell you?" said the dad.
"You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that big bank is in trouble."
"What are you talking about? That's one of the largest banks in the state," he said. "there must be some mistake."
"I don't think so," she sniffed. "They just returned one of my checks with a note saying, 'Insufficient Funds'."
Yo Momma's a bowling ball.
She is round and heavy, men stick three fingers into her and push her in the gutter.
Then she comes rolling back for more.
They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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In bed my girlfriend used to mentally dress me.
There are three 6th grade girls: a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead.
Which one has the biggest tits?
The blonde....she's 18.