Chuck Norris invented his own brand of media disc. The Black and Blueray.
Chuch Norris stood next to a bear and was told he had to leave because the bear was scared.
Chuck Norris wins every political campaign, but politely declines the jobs.
Q: What do you call a blonde in the freezer? A: Her parents named her Cindy so we should probably continue to call her that. She was supposed to graduate tomorrow.
The speed of light was instituted because Chuck Norris didn't want get winded outrunning it. Chuck Norris hates to sweat.
Steve Austin had to be rebuilt as the Six Million Dollar Man after he looked Chuck Norris in the eye, shook his hand and then went weak at the knees.
Chuck Norris can get satellite cable from a Skoal can.
There's no wine holder on this vacuum cleaner. It's like it wasn't even designed for women. How can I be expected to work under these conditions?
Q: How Many White People Does it Take To Screw In a Lightbulb? A: None, they get a nigger to do it.