Yo mama so bald, when she braids her hair, it looks like stitches.
An announcement came over the intercom for the college students: "Will the students who are parked on the wrong side of the Parking area please move their cars." Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: "Will the three hundred students who went to move fourteen cars return to class."
A drunk phones the police to report that thieves have been in his car. ‘They’ve stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, even the accelerator,’ he cries out… ‘Oh hang on. I’m in the back seat.’
What's black, smells and has 17 tits? The bin bags outside the breast cancer ward.
Legendarily naughty Little Johnny sat in class quietly as the students were composing a poem with their teacher. When she asked for an F-word that rhymed with "duck" he waved his hand feverishly. The teacher frowned and passed him by. No kids, however, could offer her a solution. Finally she glared at Johnny and called on him. Johnny put on his devlish grin and said, "An F-word that rhymes with duck is...fluctuation." The teacher blurted out, "No Johnny, that's sucks! I'm so sick of telling you what a little frigging a**hole you are!"
Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period? A. Finger painting.
Did you hear that Princess Di was on the radio a couple of weeks ago? Yep, and on the dashboard, and on the window, and on the hood....
Q: When is the only time you can smack an ugly woman in the face? A: When her mustache is on fire.
What do you say to a virgin? Thanks for nothing!
Billy: "I was playing basketball and an Asian crossed me." Mark: "Haha, how does an Asian cross you?" Billy: "Because he crosses multiplies."