Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time.
He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
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Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep?
A: When the big hand touches the small one.
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Q: When is the only time you can smack an ugly woman in the face?
A: When her mustache is on fire.
A Catholic Priest, a Rabbi, and an Atheist walk into a bar.
The bartender says, "Oh Goddammit, no! We don't like jokes in here and if you guys are a part of one, you're gonna have to leave right now!" So the catholic priest, rabbi, and atheist leave the bar and a chicken walks in.
The bartender says, "OH COME ON! We don't serve CHICKENS in here!"
The chicken says, "Do you know somewhere that does?"
The bartender says, "Yeah.."
The chicken asks, "Well, where is it?"
The bartender says, "It's across the road."
A son and the dad are walking around on the streets.
The dad stops the son and says, "Son, if you don't stop masturbating, you are going to go blind."
The son says, "Dad! I'm over here!"
Chuck Norris doesn't go to therapy, therapy goes to Chuck Norris.
Vote:
What's six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild?
Money.
Yo Mama's so stupid because it too her 2 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
Q: How can you tell if a University of Tennessee football player is married?
A: There is tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup truck.
YO MAMA IS SO STUPID SHE GOT FIRED FROM A BL*W JOB.