I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.
Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
One man (lets call him Johnny) came to gun shop. J(ohnny):I want a pistol S(alesman):Choose from this wall (points at wall full of pistols) J: (points at biggest pistol) I want this, S: An .44 Magnum? And for what purpose? J: For shooting cans. S: (points on smaller handgun) For shooting cans is the best this one. J: (points again on .44) No, I want this one. S: And what cans will you shoot at? J: Um...Mexi-cans, Portori-cans, Afri-cans...
Chuck Norris is the only one who has a silver goldfish.
Microsoft Office doesn't correct Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris correct Microsoft Office.
Chuck Norris is who killed Kenny.
Chuck Norris Killed Medusa with a round house Kick.
Chuck Norris CAN play on broken strings.
Randy Johnson can throw a fastball 101mph. Chuck Norris can throw Randy Johnson 101mph.
Yo mama so fat she wouldn't fit in 10,000 movie seat's.