Best jokes ever

"Waiter, these noodles are a bit crunchy." Waiter: "That's because they're the chopsticks, sir."
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: sport
Why beer goes through your system so fast? Because it does not have to stop to change color.
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Q: What's a tiger running a copy machine called? A: A copycat!
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: animal
A retired couple had dinner at their friends’ house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went to the kitchen. The two men were talking and one said, “We've been going to a new restaurant and it’s really great. I’d recommend it very highly.” The other man asked, “What’s the name of the place?” The first man thought awhile and finally said, “What are those flowers you send a woman you love? The ones with red petals and thorns?” “You must mean roses,” he replied. “That’s it,” said the man. He yelled to his wife, “Rose, what’s the name of the restaurant we like?”
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: old people
A couple was having a discussion about what to see and do now that they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon. Trying to assert himself rite off the bat, he exploded, "If it weren't for my money, we wouldn't be here at all!" The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your money, not only would we not be in Florida, we wouldn't on a honeymoon, nor would there be any "we" in the first place."
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: holiday, money, wife
How does a man show he's planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
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has 35.66 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: beer, men
Legendarily naughty Little Johnny sat in class quietly as the students were composing a poem with their teacher. When she asked for an F-word that rhymed with "duck" he waved his hand feverishly. The teacher frowned and passed him by. No kids, however, could offer her a solution. Finally she glared at Johnny and called on him. Johnny put on his devlish grin and said, "An F-word that rhymes with duck is...fluctuation." The teacher blurted out, "No Johnny, that's sucks! I'm so sick of telling you what a little frigging a**hole you are!"
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has 35.60 % from 194 votes. More jokes about: duck, little Johnny, student, teacher
There is a 1000 niggers and one white guy, what is the white guy called? Warden.
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has 35.57 % from 257 votes. More jokes about: black people, prison, racist, white people
Roses are red violets are blue, I have never tried So can I stick it up you?
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has 35.54 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: dirty, poems, relationship, sex
Chuck Norris doesn't need money he gets everything for free.
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has 35.51 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, money
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