"Hey Jaeger, are you enjoying that apple?"
"Sure, why do you ask."
"I was going to offer you some toast."
"How kind of... I'll accept."
"Great, but what's toast without any butter Jaeger."
"You're right about that!"
"Well give me a few seconds, let me go scrape some off of your mother's teeth!"
Vote:
Never tell Chuck Norris he lost the game because he will make you lose the game then roundhouse kick you in the face making you lose twice.
Vote:
Steve Austin had to be rebuilt as the Six Million Dollar Man after he looked Chuck Norris in the eye, shook his hand and then went weak at the knees.
Vote:
Chuck Norris needs no introduction, but if you need an introduction, you need Chuck Norris.
Vote:
Chuck Norris can win a game of scrabble using only numbers.
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What's a moo hoo for a tug-of-war between two longhorns?
A bull pull.
Two fags are on a picnic,and the first guy says,"I have to take a
dumpski,"and he walks into the woods to do it.
Several minutes later,the other guy hears the first guy crying
"Boo Hoo,I Had A Miscarriage.
I Had A Miscarriage."
He runs into the woods to see what is going on.
When he gets there,the first guy is still crying,"Boo-Hoo I Had a Miscarriage...
He looks down and says,"Don't be silly.
You didn't have a miscarraige.
You had diarrhea on a toad."
Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
Vote:
Yo mama so stupid she though iHop was a gym!
A Woman asks a Waiter What is this fly doing in my Ice cream?
The waiter says, "SHIVERING MADAM".