How do you know you’re flying over the poorer part of town? You see toilet paper hanging on the clothes lines.
A white horse goes into a bar, and orders a pint of bitter. "Blimey," the barman says, "we sell a whisky named after you." "What, Eric?" says the horse.
What do mopeds and fat ladies have in common? They're both a great ride until someone sees you on one.
Q: Why did the cowboy have sh*t in his mustache? A: Cuz he'd been lookin for love in all the wrong places.
A guy noticed that his buddy was troubled and asked what was wrong. "Ohhh, it's my girlfriend." "What's the problem?" "When I asked her if she could learn to love me, she asked me how much I was willing to spend on her education."
A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car. After looking the man over he says, "Sir, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are bloodshot. Have you been drinking?" The man gets really indignant and says, "Officer, I couldn't help but notice your eyes are glazed. Have you been eating doughnuts?"
What do you call 5,000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A good start.
Why does the chicken is sad? Because his dad is a cock. Why does the chicken is even more sad? Because he faces the same future.
Q: What do you call a 100 lack people in the ocean? A: An oil spill