What's a moo hoo for a tug-of-war between two longhorns?
A bull pull.
What's the difference between a reindeer and a snowball?
They re both brown, except the snowball.
Never tell Chuck Norris he lost the game because he will make you lose the game then roundhouse kick you in the face making you lose twice.
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Steve Austin had to be rebuilt as the Six Million Dollar Man after he looked Chuck Norris in the eye, shook his hand and then went weak at the knees.
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Chuck Norris needs no introduction, but if you need an introduction, you need Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can win a game of scrabble using only numbers.
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If a man and a woman get married in Texas and move to Washington are they still brother and sister?
Two Arabs are sitting in the Gaza Strip chatting over a pint of goats milk.
One pulls his wallet out and starts flipping through pictures and they start reminiscing.
"This is my oldest son.
He's a martyr.
"Here's my second son.
He's a martyr too!"
After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Arab wistfully says , They blow up so fast, don't they?"
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Q: Do you know what 69 is?
A: It's a good thing screwed up by a period.
Yo mama so stupid she though iHop was a gym!