The Beatles originally sang "All you need is Chuck Norris".
Chuck Norris is the only person that can stab you with a basketball- Brandon De La Riva.
The wind of Chuck Norris's round house kick can be felt from 1600 million miles away.
If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
Chuck Norris logged on MSN through the display of washing machines.
Yo Mama's teeth are so spaced out it looks like her tongue is in jail.
Q: What's red and goes up and down? A: A tomato in an elevator.
Chuck Norris had six kids, they were called SEAL TEAM 6.
Once Chuck Norris rubbed a magical lamp, nothing came out. The genie ain't stupid.
A 7-year-old boy and a 40-year old man are walking together in a dark forest. The young boy says, "I'm afraid..." The 40-year-old man replies," You're afraid?! I have to walk out of here alone!"