Teacher: "In 1940, what were the Poles doing in Russia?"
Pupil: "Holding up the telegraph lines!"
Q: How many men does it take to open a beer?
A: None, it better be open when she brings it to you.
Global warming is the result of Chuck Norris getting mad.
Vote:
When Teddy Rosavelt said there is nothing to fear but fear itself he obiously hadn't met Chuck Norris.
Vote:
When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.
Vote:
Yo' Mama is so short, she has to cuff up her panties.
Golfer: "Well caddy, do you like my game?"
Caddy: "Very good, sir! But personally I prefer golf."
Why do people like to borrow money in Alaska?
Because they have Fairbanks!
Why did the mobster put his money in the freezer?
He liked cold hard cash!
One night a man was getting very drunk in a pub.
He staggered back to take a piss, whipping his prick out as he went in the door.
However, he had wandered into the ladies room by mistake, surprising a woman sitting on the can, "This is for ladies!" she screamed.
The drunk waved his dick at her and said "So is this!"