Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - three times.
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has 34.40 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
You ever accidentally go up to a real big fat person, and you accidentally ask them for a good place to eat? And they look at you and say they don't know. And you're looking at them, like, 'You do know. I bet if I follow you for an hour, we gonna be eatin'.
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has 34.40 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: life
Chuck Norris once made an omelette from a Fabergé egg.
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has 34.40 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
Chuck Norris wanted more dialogue for his next movie. It was too short for release.
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has 34.40 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication, work
Q: What did the seal say when found nuts in the sea? A: "Look I found deep nuts."
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has 34.40 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, dirty
Chuck Norris can paint the rainbow... with black.
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has 34.40 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, weather
What do you say when you see your TV floating in the dark? "Drop it nigger!"
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has 34.29 % from 61 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
If Chuck Norris is after you, don't bother killing yourself, he'll pull you down from heaven and kill you again.
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has 34.25 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, heaven
Happy Father's Day to someome who's been completely replaced in his marriage by Fifty Shades of Grey.
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has 34.25 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: dirty, Fathers day, marriage, sex
In the year 3000, animals rule the Earth; they talk and drive sportscars. An owl enters a psychologist's office. The psychologist says to the owl, "What is your problem?" The owl replies, "I always sleep at night and am awake during the day. I am an owl and we usually are awake during the night." The psychologist tells the owl to come back in two days to solve his problem, as he is very busy. The next night, a cat comes in. He says, "I always sleep during the day. Like my friends, I want to sleep during the night. Can you help?" The psychologist advises the cat to come back in one day, as he is very busy. The next day, the cat comes very, very, very early for his appointment and ends up at the same time as the owl. The cat is told to wait outside. He peeks in the owl's appointment and figures out his problem... and his address! During the next evening, when the owl usually comes in for his appointment, the cat comes in. The psychologist asks the cat why he is here instead of the owl. The cat replies, "He is here!" and poops on the floor, explaining, "I was sent to deliver him."
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has 34.25 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: animal, car, cat, disgusting, time
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