Q: What's the difference between a dog and a fox? A: About eight beers.
Q. To a blonde, what is long and hard? A. Grade 4.
Yo mamma is so fat, when I swerved in my car to get around her, I ran out of petrol.
Q: How do you fix a woman's watch? A: You don't...there's a clock on the oven!
What do you do if your dishwasher breaks down? Kick her where the sun don't shine.
A snail goes into a bar and orders a beer. The barman says 'Sorry we don't serve snails' and throws him out. A couple of weeks later the snail goes into the bar again and says... 'What did you do that for!'
Fed up with your computer winning at chess? Try it at kick-boxing instead!
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit? The bucket.
When Chuck goes into outer space his head doesn't pop, space pops around his head!
Facebook wants to add Chuck Norris as a Friend.