Mortal Kombat was originally called 'Ways Chuck Norris Can Kill You'.
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Chuck Norris wanted more dialogue for his next movie.
It was too short for release.
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Q: What did the seal say when found nuts in the sea?
A: "Look I found deep nuts."
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Some scientists decided to do the following experiments on a dog.
For the first experiment, they cut one of the dog's legs off, then they told the dog to walk.
The dog got up and walked, so they they learned that a dog could walk with just three legs.
For the second experiment, they cut off a second leg from the dog, then they told the dog once more to walk.
The dog was still able to walk with only two legs.
For the third experiment, they cut off yet another leg from the dog and once more they told the dog to walk.
However, the dog wasn't able to walk with only one leg.
As a result of these three experiments, the scientists wrote in their final report that the dog had lost it's hearing after having three legs cut off.
He, who laughs last, laughs best.
He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.
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You ever accidentally go up to a real big fat person, and you accidentally ask them for a good place to eat?
And they look at you and say they don't know.
And you're looking at them, like, 'You do know.
I bet if I follow you for an hour, we gonna be eatin'.
Two old soldiers, Fred and Harry, are sitting in their club.
Harry turns to Fred and says, ‘When was the last time you made love to a woman?’
Fred thinks for a moment then says, ‘1947.’
‘Good heavens,’ says Harry.
‘That’s a very long time ago.’
‘Not reall
What does a nigress and an ice hockey player have in common?
They both change their pads after 3 periods.
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Q: Why don't black people like asprin?
A: They're sick of picking through cotton.
What did the black man do first time when they saw a ship?
They stick they’re head in the water to see if it has wheels!
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