What did the blonde’s right leg say to her left leg?
Nothing, they’ve never met!
A brunnette and a red haid were riding in the front of a pickup truck the blonde was in the back.
The truck crashed into the lake and the redhead and the brunnette made it to shore quickly but it took the blonde ten min.
They asked when she got there, "What took so long"?
The blonde replied, " I had to get the tailgate open".
Yo mama is so black when she went outside the street lights turned on!
One cutting edge aquarium saved a lot of money when its owner discovered a means to make the dolphins live forever -- since the dolphins never died, no money needed to be spent on buying new ones.
Extending the dolphins' lives required putting a special mixture into their food; one of the ingredients was baby sea gull meat.
So one day, one of the workers was sent to the beach to find some.
On the way back, baby sea gulls in hand, he had to pass through a forest.
In the middle of the path was a sleeping lion.
He very carefully stepped over it, only to be handcuffed by a policeman.
"Officer," he said, "what's going on?"
"You're under arrest," said the policeman.
"But why?" he asked.
The policeman replied, "For transporting young gulls across sedate lions for immortal porpoises."
Diamonds are a girl's best friend.
Dogs are man's best friend.
So which is the dumber sex?
A blonde has sharp pains in her side.
The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis."
The blonde says, "That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."
What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back!
A guy noticed that his buddy was troubled and asked what was wrong.
"Ohhh, it's my girlfriend." "What's the problem?"
"When I asked her if she could learn to love me, she asked me how much I was willing to spend on her education."
Vote:
Men are like.....Vacations.
They never seem to be long enough.
What does a frog say when it sees something' great?
Toadly awesome!