Santa Clause, The Easter Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy were all real at one time... then they met Chuck. There can only be 1 living legend.
God wanted 10 days to build the world, Chuck Norris gave him 6.
Chuck Norris can play PS3 games - on PS1
Q: What's the difference between a bullet and a Jew? A: A bullet actually comes out of its chamber.
I'm not racist cuz racism is a crime, and crime ends in jail, and jail is for blacks.
One morning Lil Johnny walks into the classroom with no shirt on. Teacher looks at him and asks where he has been.Johnny replies Blueberrys Hill. The next day Johnny walks in with no pants on. Teacher looks at him and asks where have you been. Johnny replies Blueberrys Hill. The next day Johnny comes in completly naked. The teacher gasps and asks Johnny again where hes been. Johnny replies Blueberrys Hill. Johnny looks over his shoulder and sighs her she comes now.
Q: How do the makers of Celebrex celebrate? A: Fuck if I know
A javelin thrower called Vicky Found the grip of her javelin sticky. When it came to the throw She couldn't let go. Making judging the distance quite tricky.
Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series. We know it as Forged in the fire.
What’s funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume!