Ballet is banned within a 1000 miles of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris made time wait.
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10 things men don't say
1)Let's watch Lifetime.
2)Sex is overrated.
3)I don't want to go too far on the first date.
4)Yes, your sister does have bigger breasts than you.
5)Don't we owe your mother a visit?
6)I'm relieved I don't have a large penis weighing me down.
7)Dessert goes right to my hips.
8)I hate when I miss Oprah.
9)Does this suit make me look fat?
10)I'll never get tired of listening to Dido.
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Q: What do you call the most powerful white man on the planet?
A: The President of the Unit...sh*t.
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Why didn’t the internet get any e-mail?
Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.
That recent tsunami was caused when Chuck Norris dropped a pebble into the ocean.
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I've some bread dough in my pants.
Wanna see if it rises?
Chuck Norris eats blackholes as light snacks.
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Yo momma’s so ugly, she pretends she’s someone else when she’s having sex.
Yo mamma’s so hairy, last night I confused here with a bush and pissed on her!
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