Best jokes ever

I came downstairs this morning and my wife asked me what I wanted for breakfast. So I said, ‘Eggs, bacon, fried bread and mushrooms.’ At least that’s what I meant to say. What I actually said was, ‘You’ve ruined my life, you fat ugly witch.’
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has 27.66 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: marriage
Q: What does FUBU really stand for? A: Farmers used to buy us.
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has 27.63 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: black humor
Host migration is Chuck Norris pausing multiplayer.
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has 27.61 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
When you were in the gang then, you just had to look cool, just walk around and look like you were tough. Someone started talking about fighting -- 'No, man, I've got to go home.'
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has 27.61 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: black humor
In an attempt to end WWII, President Harry Truman had Chuck Norris parachuted into Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Sept. 2, 1945, the Japanese surrendered.
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has 27.61 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, time, war
Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Fedor Emelianenko because he takes Fedor to the vet regularly.
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has 27.61 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, doctor
My wife is so kinky, when she was born, the doctor slapped her bottom to make her cry, and she said "Don't forget to pull my hair" I accidentally swallowed some WhiteOut last night. Woke up with a massive correction.
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has 27.61 % from 152 votes. More jokes about: doctor, sex, wife
Where is the best place to hide a nigger's food stamps? Under his work boots.
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has 27.60 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: food, racist, work
Chuck Norris once drank wine from a chalice. This chalice is now known as the holy grail.
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has 27.58 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, religious, wine
There's an order to the universe: space, time, Chuck Norris... Just kidding, Chuck Norris is first.
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has 27.58 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, life, science, time
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