Best jokes ever

Did you hear about the two dumb blonds who went two the drive in theater and froze two death they went two see closed for the winter?
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has 24.95 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, death, stupid, winter
Chuck Norris's kill ratio on Call of Duty:Black Ops is infinity.
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has 24.95 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, death, game
A young man was walking into town one day when a wood hauler gave him a ride. After traveling about a mile or two, the truck was stopped by the highway patrol for a weight check and inspection. The truck inspection revealed the truck had slick tires; no horn; no head, tail or signal lights; no windshield wipers. Also, it was overloaded and had bad brakes. “Mister,” the patrolman said to the driver, “I think the best way to charge you is ‘hauling wood without a truck.’”
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: cop
A regular Friday night poker game was still going strong well after midnight when one of the players returned from bathroom with an urgent report. "Roger, listen," he told the host, "Walter's in the kitchen making love to your wife!" "OK, that's it, guys," Roger said. "This is positively the last deal."
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: sport
A man is in a bar and has one too many drinks. This beautiful lady sits down next to him. He turns to her and says, "hey, how 'bout it. You and me, getting it on. I've got a couple dollars and it looks like you could use a little money." She stands up and says, "What makes you think I charge by the inch?"
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable asshole!" she screamed. That's funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her too!
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Q: To a blonde, what is long and hard? A: Grade four.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: blonde
Why did the millionaire count his money with his toes? So it wouldn't slip through his fingers!
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money
Why don't men often show their true feelings? Because they don't have any.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: men
The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman. "What are you doing out here at 2 A.M.?" said the officer. "I'm going to a lecture." the man said. "And who is going to give a lecture at this hour?" the cop asked. "My wife." said the man.
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has 24.92 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: cop
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