Yo mama so fat, her ID pic had to be taken in panoramic mode.
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Man cannot live on bread alone – he needs a bit of crumpet too.
How the children from Chernobil count from one to hundred?
On the fingers!
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YOUR MOMS HOUSE IS SO POOR I WENT TO KNOCK ON HER DOOR AND A ROACH TRIPPED ME AND A RAT TOOK MY WALET.
‘I recently sold the rights of my love life to Parker brothers, they’re going to turn it into a game.’ Woody Allen
Q: Whats the most worthless thing on a woman's body?
A: A Mexican.
Chuck Norris doesn't go on the Internet, he has every Internet site stored in his memory.
He refreshes webpages by blinking.
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Freddy Krueger sleeps with his mom every night because he is scared of Chuck Norris!
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Q: What did the fool do with his first 50 cent piece?
A: He Married Her
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How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?
At the circus the clowns don't talk.