One day a blonde, brunette, and redhead were stuck on an island 100 miles away from civilization.
The only way to get home was to swim.
The brunette swam 50 miles before drowning.
The redhead swam 64 miles before getting attacked by a shark.
The blonde went 99 miles but got tried a swam back to the island.
Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
Vote:
David: Why did the broom get a poor grade in school?
Dan: I don’t know. Why?
David: Because it was always sweeping during class!
Q: Why are dogs such bad dancers?
A: They have two left feet.
Q: What do you call a black drinking out of the toilet?
A: Pushing his luck.
Vote:
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
Vote:
The old woman comes to a gynecologist.
He inspects her and says with the
surprice:
An old woman, you're pregnant!
How did you managed at your age...?
Oh, those teens.
They always asks to tell them everything, then show and give to try...
Q: Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up women?
A: Because a woman who can't afford her own washing machine won't be able to support you.
A local policeman had just finished his shift one cold November evening and was at home with his wife.
"You just won't believe what happened this evening , in all my years on the force I've never seen anything like it."
"Oh yes dear, what happened?"
"I came across two guys down by the canal, one of them was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks."
"Drinking battery acid and eating fireworks!!
What did you do with them?"
"Oh that was easy, I charged one and let the other off."
Q: What's gray on the inside and clear on the outside?
A: An elephant in a plastic bag.