What do you call a dinosaur drinking Tequila?
Tyrannosaurus Mex.
A blonde went to buy a pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.
"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"
Q: What is a man's idea of a balanced diet
A: A Budweiser in each hand!
How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?
She fell out of the tree.
How many blondes does it take to play hide and seek?
One.
Why did the Viking buy an old boat?
Because he couldn't afjord a new one!
I've recently got a stalker.
He's everywhere all the time.
And his thing is that he sends other people to profess his love for me.
So I can be walking down the street and all of a sudden a lady will appear screaming: "JESUS LOVES YOU."
The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his chequebook open.
There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette.
They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away.
The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died.
The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died.
The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.