How come sharks don’t attack lawyers?
From professional courtesy.
The boxer fells down in the fourth round.
The referee starts counting.
Billy’s grandmother gets up on her legs from the first row and screams:
Stop counting for nothing, he won’t get up!
I know him from the buss...
After 8 rounds the boxer comes back in his corner, extremely grinded.
The couch says to him:
You should better take a decision!
You want the champion title or the Nobel for peace...
Not all the warrants, can be called milky cows, says a lawyer to a colleague of his, some of them are like the mice in the church.
Got for as lawyers that we know how to milk the mice...
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a spermatozoid?
Only one from 30.000 gets a man.
Our new midfielder cost ten million.
I call him our wonder player.
How come?
Every time he plays I wonder “why the fuck did I bothered to buy him”!
Q: What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start!
A command was given to a dog: "SPEAK!"
The dog said in return: "Not without my lawyer present!"
A drunk is driving through the city and his car is weaving all over the road.
Eventually a cop pulls him over.
"Did you know," says the cop, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out of your car?"
"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk.
"For a minute there, I thought I'd gone deaf."
A hotdog walks into a bar and orders a beer.
The bartender replies, "Sorry, we don't serve food here".