Best jokes ever

So this retarded blind couple just lives in Guantanamo Bay. The prison warden told us soon these little fishies would grow gills. So we have been feeding our fishies since 911 they all been fed really well. In our daily water events until I told my wife, "there is a problem these fish haven't grown any gills." So we told the Warden and he laughed he said: "you know what you've been doing since 911 the blind couple relied on what!" The warden replied, "well you've been waterboarding convicted isis terrorists!" The blind couple said, "what happens to the fishes?" The warden replied, "well they are dead of course!"

Now there's a rack I'd like to be stretched out on.

Football match Romania – Russia. Romania wins and receives a telegram from Russia: “You’ve won! Stop. Congratulations! Stop. Oil! Stop. Gas! Stop...

How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2.

I’m a very giving lover – I give Green Shield Stamps.

Chuck Norris does infinit loops in 4 seconds.

Chuck Norris once scored a field goal, using a hockey stick!

You don't think "The Simpsons" is all that funny, but you watch it because that Flanders fellow makes a lot of sense.

Q: Do you really want to know why white people are Prejudice, and racist towards black folks? A: Simply because when they go tan their skin at the beach it burn like bleach.

Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player? Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.