Smith was hit by a car, died, and went to heaven.
And everyone who goes to heaven has to work.
God went up to Smith, and said: Smith, you are going to make babies.
Here is this wheel, and every time you turn it, a baby will come out.
For hours, Smith spun the wheel at full speed, then he started to get tired.
As he was slowing down, a black baby came out...and Smith said: **** I better hurry because they are burning."
My girlfriend used to give amazing blow jobs, but lately they haven't been so great - they are starting to hurt me now since her baby teeth started growing in.
How the children from Chernobil count from one to hundred?
On the fingers!
Vote:
Now there's a rack I'd like to be stretched out on.
Yo' Mama is so skanky, her dildo came with jumper cables.
Vote:
Yo mamma so stupid she put her iPhone in the blender and thought it would turn into apple juice.
One day President Trump's motorcade was heading to the Mexican border to see first hand progress on The Wall.
All of a sudden a naked lone figure was seen bent over on the side of the road.
Wanting to help the president ordered the motorcade to stop.
He got out and approached the figure and suddenly realized it was Nancy Pelosi.
She was naked with her wrists handcuffed to her ankles.
The president said, "OMG Nancy what happened?"
She cried out that she was kidnapped by a bunch of people wearing MAGA hats and left to die!
The president said "Well I'm not going to let that happen" as he was unzipping his zipper.
He yelled out to the motorcade "OK boys the line starts behind me"
How does a blonde turn on the light after sex?
She opens the car door.
Q: Whats the most worthless thing on a woman's body?
A: A Mexican.
I haven’t been the same since my testicles dropped.
Mind you, I was hanging from a tree by them at the time.