10. Every Tuesday he insists it's his turn to be the siren. 9. He is starting to develop a crush on one of the transvestite hookers he arrested. 8. He wants to transfer to a K-9 unit because he thinks he'd look good in a collar. 7. He wants you to call him "Judge Dredd", and he insists that all suspects should be executed right there on the spot. 6. He talk to himself. Half of him is the "good cop", and the other half is the "bad cop". 5. He keeps asking you if his bullet proof vest makes him look fat. 4. He is exchanging donut recipes with complete strangers. 3. The perpetrators beg him to stop talking about his hemorrhoids. 2. He wants to hear less talk and more music on the police channel. 1. He keeps handcuffing himself by accident!!
A blonde walks into a library and says, "Can I have a burger and fries?" The librarian says, "I'm sorry, this is a library." So the blonde whispers, "Oh sorry! can I have a diet coke then?"
Q: Why do two skunks argue? A: Because they like to kick up a stink.
I heard my tire thumping, I thought it was flat. When I looked at my tire I discovered your cat. Sorry...
What did the blonde get on her IQ test? Saliva.
Why can’t blondes put in light bulbs? They keep breaking them with the hammers.
Q: What do you do when you see a black man with half a face? A: Stop laughing and reload.
Did you hear the one about the cannibal who passed his brother in the jungle the other day?
If Chuck Norris ever opened a restaurant, the only thing on the menu would be knuckle sandwiches and eye of roundhouse steaks.
Why do jocks play on artificial turf? To keep them from grazing.