Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris only mast*rbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
Vote:
has 22.30 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, masturbation
What is special about a dead baby over all other forms of life? You can achieve deep throat from whichever way you enter.
Vote:
has 22.26 % from 314 votes. More jokes about: baby, dead baby, disgusting, life, sex
I got this antique watch from my grandfather on his deathbed – he put up one hell of a fight for it.
Vote:
has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: money
Jesus saves. But wouldn’t it have been better if he had invested?
Vote:
has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: money
My dad is really annoyed, I had the TV on and he accidentally saw the entire football match – he’d just wanted to watch the results on the news.
Vote:
has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: sport
Why do they bury lawyers in 20ft holes? Because deep down they’re all really nice guys.
Vote:
has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: lawyer
A drunk falls into one of the fountains in Trafalgar Square. Floundering around, he looks up and sees Nelson standing on his column. ‘Don’t jump!’ he shouts. ‘This is the shallow end!’
Vote:
has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Harry applies for a job at a finance company, the manager tells him the job is his if he can crack their toughest account. Harry goes off and comes back two hours later having recovered the entire amount. ‘Amazing!’ says the manager. ‘How did you do it?’ ‘Easy,’ replies Harry. ‘I said that if he didn’t pay us, I’d tell all his other creditors he had.’
Vote:
has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: money
A woman goes to her bank with a cheque from her husband. The cashier tells her it has to be endorsed, so she writes on the back, ‘My husband is a wonderful man.’
Vote:
has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: money
An actuary priced an automobile ‘fire and theft’ policy with an extremely low premium. When asked why it was so cheap, he said, ‘Who’d steal a burnt car?’
Vote:
has 22.18 % from 6 votes. More jokes about: money
<<<1388138913901391
More jokes →
Page 1388 of 1429.