You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life?
In reality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.
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Chuck Norris can find Osama Bin Laden!
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What’s the difference between a nigger and a canoe?
The canoe is floating!
If Chuck Norris ever opened a restaurant, the only thing on the menu would be knuckle sandwiches and eye of roundhouse steaks.
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How long does it take a Mexican to build a, holy shit they're done!
A son is discussing funeral arrangements with his dying mother.
‘Would you like to be buried or cremated?’ asks the son.
The mother replies, ‘I don’t know.
Surprise me.’
Did you hear about the man who drank 5 gallons of tea?
He drowned in his teepee!
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I met a girl who used masturbate to 2 girls 1 cup.
And that kids, is how j met your mother.
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How do you get a Michigan girl into an elevator?
Grease her hips, and throw in a Twinkie.
Q:What did the black girl say while having sex?
A:Dad get off me your crushing my ciggs.