Best jokes ever

Man gives blood too save his wifes life. Few months later they are divorced. Husband says too wife, "I want my blood back you B*TCH!" Wife throws the tampon at him and says, "I will pay you back monthly you B*STARD."
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has 78.02 % from 157 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to clear his sinuses.
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: What's the difference between death and taxes? A: Congress doesn't meet every year to make death worse.
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: death, political, tax, time
What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball? A guy will actually search for a golf ball.
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: men
You're living, you occupy space, and you have mass. You know what that means? You Matter.
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: life
Just been to the gym and there's a new machine. Only used it for an hour as I started to feel sick. Its good though, it does everything 'Kitkats, Mars bars, Snickers and crisps'!
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: fat, fitness, food, gym
Q: Where is the first baseball game in the Bible? A: In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: bible, catholic, sport
A student visits the principal's office The principal asks: "What is your name?" The student replies: "D-d-d-dav-dav-david." The principal asks: "Do you have a stutter?" Student answers: "No, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was an asshole."
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: school, student
A pretty lady is standing on the side of a bridge, looking over it and thinking about jumping off. A homeless alcoholic man comes up to her as he was walking nearby. The lady notices the man coming and says: "Go away! There's nothing you can say to me to change my mind, you cannot help me." "Well, if you're going to kill yourself anyway, why don't we have sex? At least I'll enjoy it" replies the man. "No way, you're disgusting, go away." The homeless man turns and starts walking away. The lady thinks: "Is that all you were going to say to me? Nothing more? Won't you try to convince me that life is worth living that I should not jump off? Where are you going?" The homeless man thinks: "I have to make it down to the bottom. If I hurry, you'll still be warm."
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has 78.01 % from 294 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, black humor, disgusting, life, sex
Yo mama so poor she can't afford to pay attention!
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has 78.01 % from 545 votes. More jokes about: Yo mama
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