Best jokes ever

Did you ever wonder how the moon got craters? 3 words: Chuck Norris Golf.
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has 72.27 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, golf, sport
Dolly Parton and Queen Elizabeth went to the Pearly Gates on the same day. They both met with an Angel to find out if they would be admitted to Heaven. The angel said "Unfortunately, there’s only one space in Heaven today so I must decide which one of you will be admitted." The Angel asked Dolly if there was some particular reason why she should go to Heaven. Dolly took off her top and said, "Look at these, they’re the most perfect breasts God ever created and I’m sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity." The Angel thanked Dolly, and asked Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth the same question. The Queen walked over to a toilet, pulled the lever and flushes it without saying a word. The Angel immediately said, "OK, your Majesty, you may go into Heaven." Dolly was outraged and asked, "What was that all about? I showed you two of God’s own perfect creations and you turned me down. She simply flushed a commode and she got admitted to Heaven! Would you explain that to me?" "Sorry, Dolly," said the Angel, "but even in Heaven, a royal flush beats a pair – no matter how big they are."
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has 72.27 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, god, heaven, women
What do tight pants and a cheap motel have in common? No ball room.
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has 72.26 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q. Why doesn't Santa have any children? A. Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it's down the chimney.
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has 72.26 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: dirty
A little boy asked his mother: Mummy, why are you white and I am black? Don’t even ask me that, when I remember that party..., you are lucky that you don’t bark.
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has 72.26 % from 583 votes. More jokes about: sex
What do you do if an epileptic falls in your pool? Throw in your laundry.
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has 72.24 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: black humor
An English prisoner of war was held by the Germans. The Englishman was shot all over the place, and okay until one day when the German told him, "Englander, your arm is infected with gangrene we must cut it off." The English prisoner said, "Well, okay, but could you drop it over England when you go bombing." The German replied, "Yeah that will not be a problem." A few weeks later the German tells the Englishman that they have to cut his other arm off. The Englishman says, "Well, could drop it over England like you did last time." "Yeah, that will be done," says the German. The next day the German tells him that they have to cut his leg off. Once again the Brit says, "Well, could you do the same as before." The German replies, "yeah" The next the German tells him they have to cut his other leg. "Well," begins the Brit, "could you just..." The German snapped, "No! We think you are trying to escape!"
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has 72.24 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: military, prison, war
An old man goes into a pharmacy, asks for two Viagra pills and demands that the pharmacist cut them in half. The pharmacist winks at him, "OK, but do you realize they won't be as effective?" The old man says, "Listen sonny, I'm 80 years old. I don't want them for sex. I need them for getting me hard enough so I don't pee on my shoes."
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has 72.22 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: age, life, old people, sex, viagra
"You're single and I'm single too! You know what that means?" "What" "We're both ugly!"
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has 72.22 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: insulting, single, ugly
Every resturant has a drive thru when you're riding shotgun with Chuck Norris.
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has 72.22 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
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