Chuck Norris doesn't need to wear steel toes, his toes already are.
Chuck Norris never uses a navigation system. The direction he is heading is ALWAYS the right direction.
Chuck Norris has the right to keep and arm bears.
Chuck Norris can empty a swimming pool with a fork... while it's raining.
Chuck Norris' blood is the only blood to test positive for kickass.
Death once took Chuck Norris. He regreted it.
When Chuck Norris forgets something it ceases to exist.
Aliens fear that Chuck Norris might abduct them.
When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
When Chuck Norris say it's hot, people sweat.