Best jokes ever

Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: animal
Agony: a one-armed man hanging off a cliff with itchy balls.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: alcohol
Q: Why was the condom flying through the air? A: It got pissed off.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Cindy asked an old friend to go out for a drink with her after work. I don't understand, Cindy complained. When people find out I'm a lawyer, they take an instant dislike to me. Why would they do that? Her friend appeared to think for a moment and then suggested, Maybe it just saves time.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: lawyer, work
After an accident... 1st Driver : I flashed the headlights and told you to let me go first. 2nd Driver : I also started the wipers and said NO NO...
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men
A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: “We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods.” The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, “I sure wish I’d gotten to know you sooner!”
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: old people
This man was talking to a group of men at a bar and he said, "In my house I am the boss, I say when the laundry is done and when the cooking is made and when the dishes are washed." One of the guys at the table said, "How long have you been married?" The man says, "Oh I'm not married I'm single!"
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men
If Men Ruled the World... Laws: Lifeguards could remove citizens from beaches for violating the "public ugliness" ordinance. Car rental agencies would rent tanks. Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of conversation. It would be perfectly legal to steal a sports car as long as you returned it within 24 hours with a full tank of gas. Get Out of Jail Free cards would be considered legal documents.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men
An old man and old woman got married and went on their honeymoon. They were in bed getting ready to have sex for the first time and the old woman said, "I should tell you I have acute angina." The old man says, "I hope so. You sure don't have cute tits."
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: old people
How does a man take a bubble bath? He eats beans for dinner.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men
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