Yo momma’s so ugly, if you look up ‘ugly’ in the dictionary, there’s a picture of her.
One day Dan asks Bob, "So Bob what did you get for Christmas?"
Then Bob says to Dan, "Oh see that brand new red Ferrari outside?"
Dan says, "OOOOH WOW!
Bob says, "Ya, I got the same exact color tie!"
Q:What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus?
A:Santa stops after three hos.
A blonde woman is walking down the street, with her blouse open.
A cop is approaching from about a block away, thinking, "Boy, my eyes must be going, it looks like that woman's right boob is hanging out."
As he gets closer it becomes apparent that it "IS" hanging out.
When he gets face to face with her he says, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
She says, "Why, officer?"
"Well, your boob is hanging out."
She looks down and says "OMIGOD, I left the baby on the bus!"
Patient goes to Doctor, doctor starts looking at him...
- Good, good, good...
- Doctor, what's good?
- Good that I don't have what you have...
A Grandmother was checking out her grand-daughters grasp of colours and tested her regularly.
She would ask her and the grand-daughter would always get the colour right.
One day as we were heading to the doctors she turned to her Grandma and said "Don’t you think it’s time you tried to figure some of these out for yourself?"
Vote:
Q: What is height of Stupidity?
A: A man looking through a keyhole of a glass door.
Chuck Norris wears boots to protect the Earth from his feet.
Vote:
If you make a cow angry, how will she get even?
She'll cream you.
What did the magician say when he made his rabbit disappear?
Hare today, gone tomorrow.